What if steadiness could be something we practice, even in the eye of the storm? asks Marsha Egan

What if calm wasn’t a reaction, but a choice?

“You can’t calm the storm, so stop trying,” writes Timber Hawkeye, author of Buddhist Boot Camp. “What you can do is calm yourself. The storm will pass.”

It’s that simple – and that hard. But building inner steadiness isn’t about being unbothered or tuning out the world. It’s about staying rooted, aware, and present – even when everything around you seems to be pulling you in the opposite direction.

Here are three strategies to help you keep your cool, maintain perspective, and show up fully, no matter what’s happening around you.

1. Respond, Don’t React

You’ve probably heard this before, but it’s worth repeating because it’s the core of staying calm under pressure. Reactivity is our instinct. Something uncomfortable happens and boom, we’re in it. But response requires a pause, a breath, a beat.

This space between what happens to us and how we respond within us is the key. As Viktor Frankl, a psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor, once said:

“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”

So how do you practice this in real life? Start small. The next time you read a triggering post online, pause before responding. That breath is everything. It shifts you out of reflex mode and back into presence.

2. Ground Yourself in the Present

Anxiety thrives on projection, what might happen, what could go wrong, what they might think. Calm lives in the present moment. One of the simplest tools to access is a technique developed by psychotherapist Betty Alice Erickson in the mid-to-late 1900s called 5-4-3-2-1 Grounding:

  • 5 things you can see
  • 4 things you can touch
  • 3 things you can hear
  • 2 things you can smell
  • 1 thing you can taste

This sensory reset pulls you back into the here and now, where most of the time, things are manageable. You’re not lost in the future or the past. You’re just here. Alive. Safe. Breathing.

Try it the next time your thoughts start spinning. Better yet, practice it when you’re not stressed so it becomes second nature.

3. Protect Your Input, Curate Your Energy

Not all chaos comes from within. Sometimes the storm is fed by what we’re consuming. News cycles, doomscrolling, loud conversations, toxic group chats, it adds up. And if we’re not careful, it shapes our nervous systems.

Staying calm means knowing what you can handle and setting boundaries around what you let in.

This doesn’t mean ignoring reality or turning a blind eye to the world. It means being intentional about when, where, and how you engage. Turn off notifications. Take social media breaks. Say no to conversations that only stir the pot. Choose clarity over noise. Choose nourishment over hype.

You don’t have to attend every drama you’re invited to.

The Calm Choice

Learning to stay calm doesn’t mean becoming emotionless. It means becoming conscious. Present. Grounded. A steady presence amid the swirl.

Marcus Aurelius, the Stoic philosopher-emperor, put it this way:

“You have power over your mind – not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.”

In a world built to push your buttons, not reacting is a quiet revolution. Staying grounded is a gift – to yourself and to everyone around you.

Because when the world is loud, calm is contagious. And in that stillness, you just might become the eye of the storm.

Marsha Egan, CPCU, PCC is CEO of The Egan Group, a Florida-based workplace productivity coaching firm. She is the author of Inbox Detox and the Habit of E-mail Excellence. She can be reached at MarshaEgan.com, where you can also read her blog. To listen ... (Read More)

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