To combat imposter phenomenon, start by examining the evidence for your self-doubt, explains Rebecca Mander
As a coach working with professionals in the business services sector, I’ve observed a recurring challenge among my clients, especially Executive Assistants (EAs) and Personal Assistants (PAs): a struggle with confidence and a lack of awareness about their strengths. This is common in roles that have historically been undervalued, where individuals often feel the need to justify their worth and grapple with feelings of self-doubt or what is commonly known as imposter syndrome.
The role of an EA or PA has often been overlooked and regarded as mere “admin support,” despite the significant strategic value they bring to organizations. Many professionals enter these roles through administrative pathways, rather than through formal qualifications or direct career planning. As a result, they often experience feelings of being an “imposter,” worrying that their contributions are less valuable compared to other members of the team.
Understanding Imposter Phenomenon – IT’S NOT A SYNDROME!
Imposter phenomenon, first identified by psychologists Pauline Rose Clance and Suzanne Imes in the late 1970s, refers to the internal experience of believing that you are not as competent as others perceive you to be. Clance and Imes initially studied this phenomenon in high-achieving women, discovering that many struggled with intense feelings of being frauds despite significant accomplishments. Importantly, they coined it as imposter phenomenon, rather than a syndrome, because it’s not a medical condition but a persistent, emotionally rooted feeling.
Clance and Imes observed that people experiencing imposter feelings often attribute their success to luck, timing, or the mistaken judgment of others, rather than to their abilities or efforts. This can lead to constant self-doubt, anxiety, and a fear of being “found out” as a fraud, even in the face of external evidence of their success. This feeling of inadequacy is particularly acute in high-pressure roles where mistakes can have visible consequences, such as the role of an EA or PA.
EAs and PAs, like other professionals, experience imposter phenomenon for a variety of reasons. One significant factor is the “behind-the-scenes” nature of their work. While their efforts are critical to the success of their executives, their contributions are often less visible, leading to a lack of recognition, which can exacerbate feelings of unworthiness. Furthermore, because many EAs and PAs rise through the ranks without formal qualifications, they may feel as if they don’t “deserve” their success, even though their practical experience and skills far exceed any academic credentials.
Why Imposter Phenomenon Gets Worse with Success
Interestingly, Clance and Imes found that imposter phenomenon often intensifies as individuals achieve greater success. This seems counterintuitive, but the reasoning is quite simple: the higher one climbs, the more visible and vulnerable one feels. For EAs and PAs, advancing in their careers can sometimes amplify feelings of inadequacy, especially when they find themselves in the minority.
If we look around and see that we are the only person of colour, the only woman, or the only person without a formal degree at senior management meetings, for example…it feels less plausible that we should be there.
One of my clients, awarded PA of the Year 2020, exemplified this experience. Despite years of success, recognition by her industry, and encouragement from her colleagues, she admitted to feeling like an outsider in high-level meetings, fearing that her lack of formal education would make her look “silly.” In a recent interview for my podcast, she told me she feared looking or sounding ridiculous and so stayed silent. “I thought, ‘I’m in a room full of people who are really bright, and I’m not’, and I just felt as if I would look silly. So yes, I was fortunate to climb the ladder. But then I got near the top of the ladder and thought, ‘I can’t do this.’”
How to Fight the Imposter!
To combat imposter phenomenon, start by examining the evidence for your self-doubt. Ask yourself:
- What evidence supports my belief that I’m not good enough?
- What evidence challenges this belief?
By focusing on facts rather than emotions, you can better appreciate that your accomplishments are the result of your hard work and skills. With my client, once we identified where her imposter phenomenon came from, she could call it out whenever she felt it getting in her way. After spending time working through the above questions as well as the exercises below, within three sessions, she had the imposter monster well and truly quashed! She is now on the board as Company Secretary!
Recognizing Your Value
As my client discovered, understanding your value is crucial. As an EA or PA, your role goes far beyond administrative tasks. You are often a key strategic partner to your executive, managing their time, ensuring productivity, and handling sensitive information. Recognizing this value is not about being arrogant but about having a grounded appreciation for your skills and contributions.
Here’s a self-reflection exercise to help you recognize your value:
- Identify Your Strengths: What tasks do you excel at?*
- Understand Your Impact: How do these tasks contribute to the overall success of your executive or organization?
- Celebrate Your Achievements: How have you made your executive’s life easier? How has your work improved organizational efficiency?
Building Confidence
Building confidence can be challenging, especially if your ugly imposter is a frequent visitor. However, confidence is like a muscle – the more you exercise it, the stronger it becomes.
Here are some actionable steps to build your confidence:
- Identify and Amplify Your Strengths*: Reflect on situations where you’ve demonstrated resourcefulness, proactivity, or exceptional performance. Think about how you can leverage these strengths in future scenarios. Recognizing and amplifying your unique skills is key to building self-assurance.
- Face Your Fears: Often, fear of failure leads to avoidance. However, facing fears – big or small, whether it is speaking in public or switching your camera on – builds resilience and reinforces your belief in your abilities. The more you confront fear, the easier it becomes to handle, and the more confident you’ll feel as you witness the evidence that proves we cannot die from discomfort!
- Be Kind to Yourself: High-pressure roles can make you your harshest critic. Instead of striving for unattainable perfection, practice self-compassion. Reflect on your career journey and acknowledge your efforts and achievements. This mindset shift can greatly enhance your self-esteem. My free gift below (*) includes a Positive Attitude Log© that you can use to help with this!
Creating Space for Self-Reflection
EAs and PAs are the key cogs in an organisation. Amid the chaos this brings, it’s essential to carve out time for self-reflection.
Many of my clients find it beneficial to schedule “thinking time” – a dedicated moment to step back from daily tasks. Use this time to review your week or month.
I like the three Rs:
- Review: What is the summary of your month and what score would you give your performance out of 10?
- Repeat: What did you do well this month? What did you do to achieve that score?
- Refine: What would you have done differently? What would you do next time to increase the score by one, two, etc.?
Conclusion: Embracing Your Role
I often say if 10 partners left a law firm, everyone would cope… If 10 Assistants left, there would be carnage!
Being an EA or PA is more than managing schedules and responding to emails. It’s about being a crucial part of the team, solving problems, and leading behind the scenes. Your role carries immense value, and your unique skills are integral to the success of your organization.
Everyone experiences self-doubt at times. What differentiates successful individuals is their ability to overcome these doubts, recognize their worth, and continue regardless to grow within their careers. As an EA or PA, you play a vital role in your company – never underestimate the power of your contributions.
By focusing on your strengths, challenging negative self-talk, and making time for reflection, you can overcome imposter phenomenon and build the confidence needed to excel in your role.
*For support in overcoming imposter phenomenon or building confidence using any of the tips in this article, click the link below for your FREE confidence kit, which includes the Positive Attitude Log©. https://welcome.guruyoucoach.com/3-step-gift
